Where's your vibrator?

Every girl should own a vibrator, single, married or coupled up. And, in owning a vibrator, every girl should know how to use it, should know how to make herself ‘pop a good one’ and be open to learning more about her body. She should also know how to use it with someone-to enhance, to subdue, to ignite.  I must admit. I’d give myself a firm D- in that category right now. I’ve been neglecting my ‘pleasure principles’ for a while now. I’ve got the chest and it’s full of all types of contraptions and gadgets but I can’t tell you the last time I popped in a battery ;-)

Am I lewd? I sure hope you don’t think so. I’m only talking about what you’re thinking and afraid to say out loud. I bet if you were reading this in a magazine, you wouldn’t have your mouth open in awe because you can’t believe Kelly is going there. You’d probably crease the corner of the page for future reference or tear the page out. So, get over yourself. We’re all adults here and if nothing else, you may learn a thing or two and I, in turn, may get back to the basics with numero uno-ME.

So, where does one go to get sex toys? If you’re in Atlanta, try Insurrection. Don’t go to those other gaudy places that only the vile and perverted frequent. If you’re in Chicago or Indiana, go by Cirella’s. New York? Go right around the corner. LOL. It’s New York, baby! Too many to count. If you’ve never been to a sex store, you’re missing out. Don’t think of it as a place for freaks. Okay, maybe it is but if you can’t be a freak for you and the one you’re with, what’s the point? And if you’re not with anyone right now, be a freak for yourself. There’s no age limit either. I love to go in and see who else is in there. I can tell when it’s a first timer. They never want to make eye contact. And you can tell the over achievers. They always want to tell you what’s the best, new thing on the market.

But, Kelly, what do I get? Well, first off, definitely get a good vibrator. Don’t go all fancy either, trying to get ones with ticklers, etc. Keep it basic first time around. After you’ve mastered that, up your game. Go crazy but not too crazy. Don’t forget that your delicate area is very delicate. Try getting something for the other orifices also. There are many tantric, battery-operated toys that light up, vibrate, are hand-held or fit in place. Ask him what he likes and get that. If he likes it, he’ll make sure you enjoy it too.

Try a good hot, ‘heat up as you blow or lick’ oil too. Something with flavor doesn’t hurt. Might as well, satisfy every craving while you’re at it. Into dress up and role playing? Buy a cop and robber outfit or make your own out of saran wrap and fruit roll up. If you love food like I do, you won’t be against the tried and true whipped cream, banana and popsicle. Yep, popsicle! Bondage? Man, they have so many new fandango apparatuses out there now; some that actually offer great exercise-it’s not all about the pole in the bedroom anymore. By the way, that’s not a bad idea either ;-) And, not for the faint of heart, get that candle out and hot wax it up. If you get past the burning, you’ll find that it helps with blemishes ;-) The good ole handcuffs, feather, ice and scarf still works great too. 

Open up, literally and figuratively and explore your body and his/hers. If you don’t do it, someone else gladly will and I’m sure you don’t want that. And, if you’re a loner right now, think of it as practice for when you meet your freak opposite in the future ;-)

Oh yeah, there's an app for that too-iKamasutra for iPhone ;-)

I gotta get hooked up fast ;-)  I’m so cheeky!